There Aren't Enough Words

As my time as Miss Cape Shores 2013 comes to a close, I've decided to write this blog post in lieu of a farewell speech because I've made the decision to compete instead of giving up my crown. Although a very difficult and enduring decision, I want to continue to utilize the power of the crown to inspire, to serve, and to impact the lives that I meet along the way. If I pass the opportunity to compete before fall semester commences, I could possibly lose my chance at achieving my goal of competing on the Miss New Jersey stage next year due to prior commitments and a hectic first year in a specialized degree program. If you have a dream set in mind, you cannot quit or second guess your personal decisions out of fear or inhibitions. Four years ago when I started competing, I would never guess that I would be at this stage in my life, in pursuit of a relentless goal that may never happen. Going into Miss New Jersey for the first time was a one shot deal and now I'm here. I've grown tremendously as a leader, a role model, an artist, a scholar, and a visionary and that is attributed to a program whose sole purpose is to empower young women and in turn, I've been able to give back in ways I never even imagined. I continue to compete because the Miss America Organization is everything I stand for. It's provided me a forum to express my passions, my talent, and intellect in my quest to help others find their own "light" to make their mark on the world. I've realized that this tiresome dream is not just about me anymore. If you were in my shoes, with a group of young girls that motivate you, challenge you, and put their utmost pride in your accomplishments, could you say no? Too many times I've backed away from what I've worked hard for because I felt I didn't "fit the description" or because people told me I couldn't or because I was fearful of failing, but I won't do that with this dream. 

"If you can't stop thinking about it, don't stop working for it." 

My year as Miss Cape Shores certainly flew by with a swiftness in which I wish it hadn't. From the night I was crowned to this upcoming Saturday night I set out very clear cut goals for the 365 days that stood as my year of service. With a lot of faith, luck, and a dash of pixie dust, I far surpassed the expectations I had for myself, not just on the Miss New Jersey stage, but in the day-to-day seemingly "little" things that many fail to acknowledge. People recognize the glitz and the glamour of pageantry as its main focus, but it's so much more than just that. Some may say my greatest accomplishments as Miss Cape Shores lie in being named 3rd runner up to Miss New Jersey this year and winning interview amongst a highly competitive group of contestants. While this is a feat I've dreamed about for so long, there were also many more equally(if not better) hurdles I jumped over throughout the year. Ten to twenty years from now, I won't remember how I placed at the state pageant, or what prelim awards I won, but I will remember how I cried when Amy placed 2nd runner up at Miss New Jersey's Outstanding Teen, the looks on the faces of the children and parents I collected school supplies for when I handed them the donations, being called "Miss America" backstage at the Seashore Line Pre-teen/Princess pageant by a starry-eyed contestant, sharing my love of dance with hundreds of children across the state, staying up late and laughing until I couldn't breathe with my pageant sisters after the final night of Miss New Jersey, and being surrounded by the love and support of  Cape Shore clan at the surprise party they planned for my send-off. This year alone I was able to collect almost 1,000 school supplies to be donated to children affected by Hurricane Sandy, started a non-traditional Girl Scout troop of at-risk girls who changed my life, raise almost $1,000 for Children's Miracle Network Hospitals through an inaugural Day of Dance fundraiser, expand my platform to reach school children up and down the state through a school-wide speaking tour, founded a chapter of She's the First at Rutgers- a non-profit that sponsor girls' education in the developing world, and built a strong social media presence for my organization, The Arts Empowerment Project, as a way of raising awareness of the value of arts education. My platform and dedication to serving others will be something withstanding that even after my years of competing are long over, I can still make a tangible impact on those I come in contact with. If there is anything I've learned in pageantry, it's that a crown is a shiny piece of metal with some rhinestones on it; however, it's what you do with it that gives it its importance and value. 

The old saying "It takes a village to raise a child" could not be more true in my case while reflecting on this past year. I have so many thank yous, not enough words, and a grateful heart for those who walked into my life this year and left handprints that will last a lifetime. Here it goes...

Anne-You have left such an immense impact on my life, to say the least. From the moment I was crowned your girl, we formed a relationship that goes far beyond that of a director/titleholder and you made me a part of your family. From hour-long phone calls to just catch up because we missed each other to going gown shopping to e-mails about current event topics to you being there through every phase of my preparation, I could not have done it without you. You took the time to get to know me not just as a pageant competitor, but as a young woman with goals, dreams, and hobbies. You invested your energy to being a part of my daily life and supported me in every single step I took this year whether it was academic, social, or pageant-related. You cheered loudly through all my triumphs and lent an ear whenever I was down on myself and needed someone to talk to. Thank you for going above and beyond as a pageant director, but most importantly, thank you for being my lifelong friend. I love you more than you will ever know.
                                               
Amy-To my first little sister, who knew that when you agreed to dance at my first fundraiser three years ago that I would be crowned your big sister and that we would form an untouchable bond of love and friendship? God truly had the stars aligned for us and I could not imagine sharing this incredible year with anyone other than you. When I first met you and watched you compete, I knew there was something so unique and genuine about your giving heart, power to move people with your inspiring words, and your impeccable talent. Watching you dance and the love you have for the art form continuously pushes me to have that same vigor and fluidity that you do. The way you speak about your passions and dreams reminds me every day that amidst the traps I've seen many young people fall into, there is still innocence and goodness in the world. Watching you grow this past year has made me cry tears of pride many times because you exemplify everything this organization promotes. You've been my biggest fan all year long and put up with my craziness, no matter the time of day, when I became stressed and overwhelmed. You are MY role model and my mentor in ways you cannot imagine. You inspire me with the hard work you dedicate to becoming your best self inside and outside of the pageant world. From mock interviews over the phone, to ranting and raving about everything pageant related, to critiquing my talent in ways no one else could or would, to being the first person standing and waiting for me after the final night of Miss New Jersey, you have made me feel like Miss America every single day of my life, and I love you for that. 

Emily-The littlest of my Cape Shore girls, you are more than just my pageant little sister and if anyone asks, you are my real-life little sister. I could be having the worst day and your sense of humor and spunky attitude never fails to lift my spirits. I never knew that at such a young age someone could achieve so much, but I am astonished every day at how much you do to make a difference in the world around you. The way you look up to me and believe in all of my achievements motivates me to wake up every morning and do it all over again. I have been so blessed to be there for everything from your dance recitals, to pageants, to just hanging out at your house because you opened your arms to me as a little sister and I never left. I am so proud of the growth you achieved in just a short year from being a shy "Little" to embracing your huge personality in being confident in all of your abilities as a "Pre-Teen." I can't wait to continue to watch you grow and like I always say, "You're not getting rid of me."

Carleen- Thank you for embracing me and making me a part of your family. I think there was a time this year that I spent more time at your house than my own. As my "second mom" you treated me like I was your real daughter and went out of your way to always invite me to all of Emily's events and be at all of mine. You're always one of the first people I text when something pageant-related happens and I look forward to our weekly phone calls about anything and everything. I truly cherish the relationship 

with have, and like Emily, you've been one of my biggest fans. 

Hantz- You came into my life this year at a turning point and I don't know how I lasted this long without your humor to lighten my days, your spirituality to keep me grounded, and your love that has made me feel comfortable and confident in my own skin for the first time. You made me go to the gym even when I threw a fit and didn't want to because you could see the benefits in the long run while I was jaded. You talked current events with me every day and argued my viewpoints to get me prepared for interview(and asked me the most ridiculous interview questions EVER!) You constantly reassured me that I had and have everything and more than it takes to be a successful titleholder and you immersed yourself in my community service and platform work. You made all of my successes and failures your own and you pushed me to always be more, do more, and want more. If there's one thing I could thank you for, it's not just loving me for all that I am and all that I'm not, it's that you showed me there's more to life than being serious and that it's okay to laugh at myself every once in awhile. Thank you for taking the crazy ride with me and never getting off at any of the stops. You are more than I ever imagined in a better half. Thank you for being my "dream guy." 

Anna-One of the best things this organization has given me is you. You are my best friend, my sister, and my confidant and I would not be able to continue competing if you weren't by my side. From long car rides across the states to go to events, to talking about crazy boy problems, to eating McDonald's at 2am while driving home from Miss New York(woops!), to riding the "Cierra train" til there is none, I love the relationship we've built over the past few years that only continues to grow stronger and stronger. Anna, there's nothing more I love than watching you "do your thang" and as many times as I've heard you sing, I still get chills every.single.time. You encourage me to be the best version of myself and I try to emulate your unfaltering sense of self-confidence, your ability to command attention, and the love you have for those you meet. With Courtney by our side, we've become the three best friends anyone could ever have. I've found a sense of myself in our friendship and you've both taught me what it means to be a supportive friend through good times, bad times, and rough times. Courtney, I loved watching you come out of your shell this year and truly shine. I am honored to have you as a part of my life. P.S. We still need to have our Yogo date. Thank you for being my best friends through it all. I love you like crazy. #Dassit

Mom & Alvin-Ever since I told you guys three years ago that I was going to compete in a pageant, you told me I was crazy, and when I won, you did everything possible to make my outrageous dream a reality. From traveling with me to countless appearances, fittings, mock interviews, and talent rehearsals to financing my dream pageant wardrobe even when it wasn't in the budget, to becoming (against your will) full-blown pageant parents, I am blessed to say you are truly the backbone to my success in pageantry. Thank you for teaching me the core values of independence, perseverance, and that if you want something in life, you have to work for it relentlessly because it will not be handed to you. My educational foundation and passion for helping others realize their academic and artistic potential stems from your emphasis on my education from an early age. There was never a time in my life where you weren't vested in my extracurricular activities and pageants are no exception. Mom, I trust your judgement more than anyone and you never let me leave for an appearance or go on stage looking anything less than my best(because I know you'll lecture me for an hour if there's one wrinkle in my dress). Alvin, you always sport your "proud face" and have a collection of my Miss New Jersey headshot buttons in your car with your "Parent of Contestant" badge for everyone to see. It's the little things you guys do that don't go unnoticed that have molded me into a successful young woman. I credit all of my achievements to your undying support for all of my goals, no matter how big or small(or how much they cost), and most importantly, the love and pride you exude on a daily basis. I do it all to make the two who mean the most to me proud.

To the shore directors- Carol, Michael, Tony, Grammy, and Kay- Thank you for all your love even before I was a "shore girl." Whether I'm a shore girl or not this weekend, you will all have such a large spot in my heart because you've cheered for me throughout the years and been a part of my growth. The family aspect of the shore pageants has changed my outlook on pageantry and given me many people to lean on in times of need. Mr. Nicolle, thank you for believing in my potential and for sparking a sense of confidence that I've been missing for so long. Todd, thank you for seeing something special in me and offering your help and guidance throughout the year. Ashley, Alaina, and Pat, the Cape Shore family would not be complete without you. Thank you for being a large part of my year and making sure you were there every step of the way. Your support has meant everything to me and I can't wait to be there as the girls continue on with pageants and support you just as you've been there for me.
To my pageant friends/sisters-You inspire me every day to be more. I am so bewildered at all of your accomplishments, your talents, and your service. The sisterhood aspect of this organization is such a vital part and I am so glad that I get to connect with you all on a level no one else could ever understand. Cara, I can't wait to watch you rock it at Miss America. I am so honored to have someone so intelligent and hilarious represent our state and our Miss New Jersey class of women on the national level. 
To Lou, Sally, Joan, Barb, Melissa, Lisa the Miss New Jersey Education Foundation- Thank you for providing me and young women across the state opportunity to grow professionally and personally while providing a platform for us to excel in every facet of our life. It is because of your tireless dedication to this program that I've transitioned from a shy 17 year old who didn't quite have a grasp on who she was as an individual into an accomplished 20 year old with life experience and enough scholarship money to continue on her educational pursuit. You've all welcomed me with open arms and allowed me to be a part of something so much larger than myself. 
To Joanne, my hostess extraordinaire this year, I was SO blessed to have you. From calming me down before interview with your pep talk, to making sure my hair looked perfect every time I went onstage because of your magic touch, you were Team Cierra all the way. Not to mention after I made top ten and was crying hysterically upstairs while trying to change into talent with no time to spare, you made sure I went onstage fully focused and calm enough to perform. To Kathy, my first hostess, I will always be your girl. Thank you for being so loving of me all year round via Facebook and always making sure I know that you're rooting for me. I love you both. 

 

 

 

To the Rutgers Dance Team and my coaches-Thank you for cheering me on win or lose and being so involved and interested in everything that I do as a titleholder. Your love and support over the years has formed me into a stronger dancer and individual on and off the dance floor- I love you all.

To the next Miss Cape Shores- Please soak up every single minute of your year of service because it will go by faster than you can snap your fingers. You are in for the ride of your life, so make it a time for growth, set goals for yourself from the very beginning, and give until you have no more left to give. At the end of your journey you will be astonished at how much you can accomplish with the love and support of a family, a team behind you and utilize all of your resources to make this year one for the books. 

I will end this long-winded spiel with the quote I live by, "You have to find what lights a spark in you so that in your own way you can illuminate the world."

For the last time, I am Miss Cape Shores 2013, Cierra Kaler-Jones.